"Restoring Family Bonds" Rescue Radio with Marjorie Cole

0:00 Music. Rescue Radio, because there's a war for your soul. Yes, indeed, there is a war, and we're in it, but we've already won. So thank you, Lord Jesus, for dying on the cross for us. Thank you for giving us victory and power over all the power of the enemy. Thank you for your wisdom, your counsel, and your promise that no weapon formed against us will prosper in Jesus' name.

0:44 So today we're declaring this as I Love My Mother Month. I love my mother. This seems like a, what? What do you want to talk about this for? Well, it's not Mother's Day. No. It's not me. But you know what? There's a lot of people, parents, moms, and dads, who are super grieved and tormented in fiery trials and tests regarding their children and what's happening with their children. And so we just want to look at that a little bit through the Scripture today and be encouraged because, number one, to know that relationships, The whole society, family, everything is built on connections, and those connections, roads, if you will, are relationships.

1:27 And if Satan can undermine and destroy those foundations, he's got everything. And so we're looking at relationships and what has happened to our parent-child, mother-father-child relationships today. What you said about foundations. The Bible says if the foundations are destroyed, what can the righteous do? Yeah. Whoa, whoa, whoa. That's so amazing. That is so, you think about that. Proverbs, it's what, no, it's Psalm 11, 3. So if you think about that, what can the righteous, I guess that's what we're looking at today. What can the righteous do when the foundations are disintegrated, when the children have went away, when they're confused, lost?

2:07 You know, that's one of the curses that comes out of Deuteronomy, too. When you lose your children, they'll go to alien nations, they'll go to other people, other situations where you lose touch with them, you lose your love connection with them. Yeah, and of course, the foundation of this is the fifth commandment, honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you. So he talks about the key to prosperity, to blessing. In the land, in what God is giving to us. The key to whole this blessing is honoring father and mother. And God is very strict about this.

2:49 It says in Leviticus chapter 20, verse 9, for everyone who curses his father or his mother shall surely be put to death. He has cursed his father or his mother. His blood shall be upon him. So God puts a high premium on honoring father and mother. Well, you know, and now in the New Testament, we don't put people to death for things like that. No. But they do begin to die spiritually, emotionally, relationally. And see, here's the problem. I really believe it's an eye for an eye kind of a justice that Satan has brought upon us because, you know, when we fail to honor God or love him, trust him as our father, obey him, When we fail to do that, then Satan says, okay, now I have a right to bring that back on you.

3:38 So if you've rebelled against God, then I have a right to cause your children to rebel against you. It's just that, that's the same, it's that law of reciprocity. And so we don't realize it, but the key to our children coming back to the Lord is probably in our hand. Yeah, part of it, to honor father and mother, the honor means heavy to not, and I'm talking about physical weight here, you know, because your mom's overweight or something like that. But it says give weight or value to her. Esteem her highly. It doesn't mean you worship your mother, but you have a high esteem for her because she, not only did she physically give birth to you, but she, you know, in most cases, not every case, She nurtured you in those delicate early years of your life and nurturing you not only physically, but hopefully, if you were blessed with a godly mother, she nurtured you in the ways of God as well.

4:43 Yeah, so basically what has happened to the mother-child or parent-child, which is a primary relationship, what has happened to this? Satan has put very adverse circumstances in the generations before them. So a lot of mothers are coming out of a dysfunction, abandonment, rejection, whatever themselves, and so they're doing the best they can. But we have to know that there has been a diabolical undermining of the relationships that we have with our parents and with our children. And when we understand it's a diabolical targeting of those relationships, then you as a follower of Jesus Christ must recognize that this is a serious situation where we have to know how to work.

5:31 Overcome, prevail, and win the day, so to speak. Because if we don't, Satan wants our children. He wants us. He wants our children. And he can get to us through our children. And he can get to our children through us because we're connected. So a lot of times, the problem is disobedience. The problem is distrust. The problem is being betrayed, lied to, and then you don't trust your parents, for example. Then you're going to go figure it out yourself because you think you have a better way. And the problem is when a child starts out in their life, they don't even know who they are. They don't even know, they don't have a clear identity formation. And as we go on, the enemy is trying to create an identity or add to the truth of who we are with all kinds of lies and false ideas of who we are.

6:18 And so we make our decisions based on our identity. And if you don't know who you are, then you're not going to make very good decisions. A lot of times parents have no idea who they are. Well, there you go. So if they don't know their own identity in God, in Christ, how are they ever going to communicate that to their children? Well, you know, the thing is the foundation, the standard is still the Word of God. We have to go back to the basics, go back to the commandments, go back to see who we are. And God is not doing this to us because he's a killjoy and he's a control freak and he has to have everything his way. He is simply opposite. Just like you, as a good parent, know the right thing for your child, but you can't make them do it. However, you can set up an example.

7:01 You can teach them when they're young, whatever you can do. But at the end, they get to make their own choices. And many of us have made bad choices based on the influences of those around us or the circumstances or the enemy himself, which is everywhere. And so we're kind of crawling out of a broken rubble. We're crawling out of foundations that have been blown up and destroyed. So now going back to what can the righteous do? What can the righteous do? Well, we can start with what the Bible says. And we have some very good, you know, Proverbs, for example, that tell us, go ahead, honey. Yeah, Proverbs chapter 10, verse 1, it says, A wise son makes a glad father, but a foolish son is a grief to his mother. Whoa, isn't that true? I might be talking to mothers here now that you've got kids, sons, or daughters that have just gone astray.

7:49 And your heart is just grieved and torn. So what are you going to do about that? Another thing, too, is the attitude of a son, or we could say a daughter. Here, Proverbs 15, 20, a wise son makes a glad father, but a foolish son despises his mother. Now, there's a spirit there that why, you know, despising your mother. And it's not mothers aren't perfect. It's not like, well, you know, you just, you did so many things wrong. I don't like you. And a lot of times kids have no idea of who they are. They have no idea of right and wrong. They basically think, you know, you don't know anything, Mom. Well, here's the thing.

8:34 Proverbs 10, one says the same thing. A wise son makes a glad father, but a foolish son is the grief of his mother. That's the same thing. I just read that. Yeah, you just read that. I'm sorry, I was looking at another. Here's another one. It's worth repeating. Yeah, it is. Proverbs 19, 26, he who mistreats his father and chases away his mother is a son who causes shame and brings reproach. And so there's a spirit, there's a rebellion. Those of you that have kids, sometimes you have kids that get to a point where they're just testing everything. There's that spirit of rebellion that just seems to, the foolishness is bound in the heart of a child, the Bible says, but the rod of correction will drive it far from him.

9:23 So we're talking about rod of correction. We're not talking necessarily about beating them physically, but the Bible does talk about there's a place and time for that that's done in love and not in anger, but the rod of correction. Right. Correction. Train up a child in the way that he should go, and when he's old, he will not depart from it. So there is that process of training and raising and keeping the standards before them. But again, most of the parents of us, we have left the standard and we try to do it in our own way. We use, you know, everything from Dr. Spock to the latest, you know, fad or whatever it is to try to train our children. And we have lost, we've caused confusion in them because we are confused.

10:05 And so, you know, what we have to do is really... You know, go to the Lord ourselves and say, Lord, first of all, I need to surrender or confess or repent of my own disobedience. I think that's the first thing we need to do to bring our children back. And also to understand one more thing, that the enemy knows that the primary first link in our, you know, our lives is that relationship with our parents. And so if he can break that link, the whole chain is broken. Well, especially with mother, because the mother is the nurturer. They're there physically, spiritually, nurturing. Or maybe not. And when they're not. Or defiling. Yeah. Nurturing or defiling that child by their own heart attitude and their actions. Or absence.

10:50 I think of all the destructive scenarios that people can go through, and I see a lot of people in their life stories, the most destructive is the absence of the mother. You know, the father abandons and we can still survive. But when the mother abandons, then it's like a death blow to everybody. She's kind of like the heart of the family. And so I know a lot of people have that brokenness and they want to overcome that. They want to, you know, restore that. But you have to start where you are and let God bring you up out of the place where you were born and raised and trained up. You start where you are and let God bring you up to the place where he has for you. He has got a good place for you. There's a scripture, and I don't have it right now, that says, when my father and mother forsake me, then the Lord will take me up or take care of me.

11:40 So God's going to take care of you if you're fatherless. God is the God of the widow. There it is. And the widows, so many single-parent moms, they're, in effect, widows, even if their husband, their ex or whatever is still living. They're widows. He's the God of the widow and the fatherless. He's a father to the fatherless and a husband to the widow. Psalm 68 says, verse 5, A father of the fatherless, a defender of the widows, is God in his holy habitation. Amen. God sets the solitary in families. He brings out those who are bound into prosperity, but the rebellious dwell in a dry land. And this gives us a key to what needs to go on. We need to come back out of that place of rebellion and distrust of God and doing it myself and trusting my idols to take care of me, whatever those idols might be.

12:31 It might be yourself. It might be your work ethic. It might be something else. But we're going to, or we have given up on God, completely go the opposite way and do the drugs and do the whole thing where I don't care and my life isn't worth living. We have to you know you have to decide first of all whether your life is worth living and then you go back to okay i cannot at some point you know when your children are little and you can care for them and carry them around and put them in the car seat and whatever you all do that's that's nice in a way but when they get older and they get to come and go in and out the door and stay away and you know get confused with their identity and their gender and their friends and their drugs, and they're being inundated every day, every day with the video games and the movies they watch and the TikToks.

13:19 It's an almost impossible task for a parent right now these days to keep their child in any way other than to give that child to the Lord and let the Lord protect them because there's just so much out there now to kill a child, take them away, destroy them completely, you know, so God wants us, yeah, to go back to the foundations, go back to, and that starts with you. You say, well, I can't do anything. There's nothing I can do. Yes, there's always something. There's always one thing you can do. The first thing is to get yourself right with God and repent for your own disobedience in any way that the Lord would show you or convict you of it by the Spirit.

13:59 Because God wants, before you can pull someone else out of the pit, you have to be standing on the rock yourself. And with mothers, I believe there's mothers listening to us right now that feels, they're so full of self-condemnation because they figured, oh man, I failed or I was addicted. I wasn't there for them. I didn't understand them. I was suffering through our divorce. The father of the children, the biological father just or turn them against me. Sometimes exes will turn kids against mothers or fathers.

14:39 It can be both ways. And so this is a real, Real conundrum, and it's like you just have to come to the place of forgiving. Exactly. And like you said, Margie, repenting, turning away from this, and Lord, forgive me for where I've been here, and Lord, just help me. To come back to you myself. So before you can bring your child back, you have to come back yourself. And then you're right. Forgiving, there's so much power in forgiveness. You need to forgive yourself. Number one, did you do those things because you wanted to? No, probably not. You probably didn't because you had no other options. You were pretty bound into your circumstances. And, you know, the devil messes up our lives. Just put it down.

15:20 He's doing it. And so forgive yourself, forgive your children, forgive God, forgive your ex. Stop blaming other people for what the devil is doing to try to take you and your family away, destroy them, and get back to God and ask God to be your defender, to bring back your children. Because he said, he says, he's going to do that. All of our children will be taught by the Lord and great will be the peace of them. And so we have to take, first of all, forgive. Don't skip that step. Let go of the judgments you've made against yourself for failing to do this, that, and the other thing. Because if you don't, the devil is going to use your unforgiveness towards yourself as a justification to bring his demonic judgment upon you and keep the pain going in your heart and keep the separation going between you and your child. Forgive.

16:05 Maybe you did some things wrong. God already knew that. And you didn't want to do them wrong. probably you were forced. There was no options, other options, whatever. It doesn't matter. What matters is right now, that you see what's going on. You turn this whole crisis over to God because it's out of control. You can't do anything except cry out to the Lord and forgive yourself and take courage and trust that God is the one who's going to redeem and heal your family. Let's look at Deuteronomy 28. It talks about the curses of disobedience, right? Right. There's the blessings. There's a blessing. There's generational blessings. So often we have to focus on generational curses because there seem like there's so many of them.

16:50 But one of the things is when you disobey the Lord, you turn away from the Lord. He says, Deuteronomy 28, 32, Your sons and your daughters shall be given to another people. We referred to that a little bit earlier. And your eyes shall look and fail with longing for them all day long, and there shall be no strength in your hand. Let's talk to, say, a mother right now. Your son and your daughter, you're in a strange land. You're among another people, right? There's another people out there. There's a generation that curses his father. I think it's Proverbs 21, and does not bless their mother, but they're just basically chewing on him with sharp teeth, basically. So what about this mother that has kids?

17:39 They're out there. They feel just total helpless. They're out there. Sometimes you don't have no idea where they are. Yeah. If they're alive, if they're dead, they're using, they got bad friends. They don't respond. They don't communicate. They don't respond. They don't communicate to you. Any information to you. You're cut off. You're ghosted, like they say. Talk to this mother that may be in that position right now. Well, first of all, know that the Lord God sees you, loves you, hears you, and is carrying your broken heart. He's the only one who can carry it because there's no one else that is that close to you. And he's with you all the time. He's been there through the whole thing. From the beginning to now. He's never left us or forsaken us.

18:20 So what you want to do is, first of all, like we said, forgive yourself, let go of it. I'm not a bad mother. That's one of the biggest demonic torments. I've been a bad mother. Or I am a bad mother. Or being accused of being a bad mother. You know what? You didn't want to be a bad mother. No one ever does. And yet many bad, bad, bad things happen to us. And so it ends up like we do things that we don't even know how to do, and they turn out bad, and then we become thinking we're bad. Forgive yourself, forgive your ex, forgive your children for believing lies, and then forgive yourself for believing lies, and then go back to taking courage in God. Turn this over to God. Let him do the lead, be the lead on this rescue and restoration operation.

19:03 Let him and his Holy Spirit be the lead. You have to stay in a place of peace. You have to also know this, that all things work together for good to those who love God and are called according to his purpose, so that whatever Satan is doing now to grind and destroy and cut off and separate and kill your children is the very exact thing that God is using to make them and to create them and shape them and form them into the image of Jesus Christ. So these hot, fiery trials, this pressure, this crucible that they are in right now is what God is using to make them mighty warriors for him. So take courage and also know that God is moving among that generation even now in a mighty and a powerful way. And then also know, as I said.

19:49 All things work together for good. Even these terrible things that we don't know how they'll ever work out, we trust the Lord that they will work out and that he is good to keep our children in the midst of the fiery trials. And, you know, he can bring them back. You know, it's interesting where the Bible talks about in Luke 15, the story of the prodigal son, and the father doesn't say anything about the mother right there. But the father, you know, the son is out there, and the father has a pretty good idea of what he's up to, but he waits. He waits for him to come to himself and return home. And so— And it's interesting in that story that the father must have been watching out the end of the driveway for almost every day because it said when he saw him coming a long way off.

20:39 So he spotted him a quarter mile down the road, and he recognized him as his son. and then he sprung into action and got his, you know, his robe and his ring and his shoes and all this stuff he wanted to do. And, you know, again, when you, when your children come back to you, you don't need to lecture them and say, I told you so. And what were you thinking? Just, just save it, keep it, shut it, shut the lip there because what you want to do is listen, hear their heart, compassion. You want compassion, give them compassion, Be patient with them. They're young. They don't always know everything. And then the final thing is, as you've seen what God is doing, and this is a battle.

21:20 This is where faith and courage and declaration, binding and loosing come into play. You can do that all day long as you want to, as you're led, to bind the powers of darkness, the forces of darkness, the deception, whatever those generational spirits are. And that's another thing you can do is look at the generational sins that we talked about in Deuteronomy, to confess the disobedience, the rebellion, the idolatry, the sexual perversions, the witchcraft that's gone on in your bloodline. Confess that. It says that's one of the things he tells us to do. Confess those sins and then God will restore the covenant. So get that out of the way first. Confess those things. Now the final things are rejoice and remember.

22:02 Rejoice that God, you know, offer the sacrifices of praise. This is a sacrifice. It's very hard to be thankful and rejoice and open your mouth and sing praises to God and shout it to God with the voice of triumph when it doesn't look victorious at all. This is true sacrifice. This is not, you know, a burnt offering of a lamb or a goat or something on an altar. God doesn't want that. When you are so broken and yet out of that brokenness, out of those tears, out of that. Almost like it's never going to end kind of torment. And you can say, God, I still believe you're still on the throne. You still know where my children are. I trust you. I thank you.

22:43 I rejoice in what you're doing. When you start doing that, I believe the burden will lift and God is already moving. And so when you give him praise, you're just encouraging him to go faster, to do it with more gusto, to get it done more quickly, because God is not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance. And in Isaiah, we have these tremendous promises of God spoken especially to women, the forsaken wife, the woman, the widow. And he says here, I'm going to read it. Well, let's go to Isaiah 43, first of all. He says, and this is 43, Isaiah 41 and 43, those two chapters, first parts of the chapters are really, really good for encouraging us. He says in 43.

23:28 But now, thus says the Lord who created you, O Jacob, and he who formed you, O Israel, fear not, for I have redeemed you. I've called you by your name. You are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you, and through the rivers, they will not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned, nor shall the flame scorch you, for I am the Lord your God. Remember that. The Holy One of Israel, your Savior. I gave Egypt for your ransom, Ethiopia and Sheba in your place. Since you are precious in my sight, you have been honored. I have loved you. Therefore, I will give men for you and people for your life.

24:13 Fear not, for I am with you. I will bring your descendants, your children, from the east and gather them from the west. And I will say to them, to the north, give them up. And to the south, do not keep them back. Bring my sons from afar and my daughters from the ends of the earth. Everyone who is called by my name, whom I have created for my glory, I have formed them. I have formed him. Yes, I have made them. So God is going to call back the ones that he's made for himself, of your sons, your daughters, that he gave to you, put in your care, and now he's bringing them back. And this is where we get to trust God.

24:54 And don't throw your life away with depression and exhaustion or try to use false comforts to sedate and seduce yourself or find another escape. Just stand, and having done all, receive the courage, receive the strength of the Lord. And then we go on to Isaiah 54, which is another awesome promise, especially for the broken. He says... He says, sing, O barren one, and you who have not born. So he's speaking to the women, and he says in verse 4, Do not fear, for you will not be ashamed, nor be disgraced, for you shall not be put to shame. For you will forget the shame of your youth and will not remember the reproach of your widowhood anymore.

25:34 You remember what they said about you, how they accused you, how they rejected you, how they cast you out. He says, verse 5, for your maker is your husband, the Lord of hosts is his name, and your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel. He is called the God of the whole earth. For the Lord has called you like a woman forsaken and grieved in spirit, like a youthful wife when you were refused, says the Lord. For a mere moment, I have forsaken you. And it feels like we've been forsaken or abandoned. But with great mercies, I will gather you. With a little wrath, I hid my face from you for a moment. In other words, he had to turn his face even away from Jesus when he was dying on the cross because it was so grievous and so painful. but with everlasting kindness, I will have mercy on you, says the Lord, your Redeemer.

26:17 And then we go up into verse 13. He says, and all your children shall be taught by the Lord. All, all your children, your sons and your daughters that have been scattered to the north and the south and the east and the west. And great will be the peace of your children. In righteousness, you shall be established. You shall be far from oppression. You shall not fear. And from the terror, it shall not come near you. Instead, they shall surely assemble, but not because of me. Whoever assembles against you shall fall for your sake. And then he goes on to say, no weapon formed against you shall prosper. Every tongue, all those tongues that have spoken against you, gossiped against you, cursed you, cut you off, slandered you, said evil things about you to your children or vice versa.

27:04 All those tongues that rise up against you, you shall judge. you shall condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord and their righteousness is from me, says the Lord. So all of this, these are the most difficult of the fiery trials. I think relationships, children, broken relationships and being accused and Satan is clever and insidious. He can even create in the children such a false imagination. Despising or accusation of you Even through their friends, through their media, through their music, through the things that they're being exposed to every day, the things they're ingesting every day, and even through their dreams.

27:46 He can set people up to believe lies about one another. So you have really no other recourse. Except the Lord God, who is the father of you and your children. So we are thanking the Lord that this is one of the most difficult trials, but this is the one that's the closest to God's heart because he's not willing that any should perish. So in these days right now, when everything is up for grabs and Satan is grabbing children out of the nests, even before they're born, grabbing souls, grabbing children, grabbing them when they're, you know, exposing them to wicked things, even the minute they're born, things that they have no control over.

28:32 And sometimes their parents don't either. Lord God, we are lifting our children up to you and the circumstances in which they are being born. The words, the lies, the diabolical assaults and attacks against our babies. Against our children, against our grandchildren. Father God, we are asking for We're an all-out war of heaven against this plot of the enemy and all-out war of the heavenlies to come back and do battle for our children, that they will come back to their senses as the prodigal, come back to themselves, come back to their right minds, Lord God, and they will repent and they will not be ashamed and they'll not be too ashamed to repent and admit they're wrong and come to ask for forgiveness, be restored in their relationships, that the true work of God may be done on the earth and not after we're dead.

29:20 May the true work of reconciliation and healing between us and the father and between us and our children be done here now in this place. And we lose the presence of God to work in the children's hearts, to work in your heart as a child of your parents, work in our hearts, God, to undo the damage, the lies, the accusations, the mindsets, the programs, the software, the body of death, the strongholds that we've been nurtured and brought up in. Release us, Father God, that we might love one another, that we might be restored to being loved and to love, Father God, in Jesus' name. And you have a book, Margie, that addresses this, Doing Relationships God's Way. Tell us a little bit about that.

30:03 Well, there are many, as I said earlier, relationships are like roads. And the first relationship you have is the relationship you have with yourself and the ones that we have after that with our parents, with God. All these form connections, all these inter-net us or interlink us to other people in society, families. So there are many things that can go wrong in relationships. As a matter of fact, there are probably 100,000 things that go wrong than that can go right. So Doing Relationships God's Way, you can pick it up on our website, liferecovery.com. And I think it's also on amazon.com. So again, we've got several other books out there. Check it out. Amazon, Spiritual Warfare and How Deliverance Can Change Your Life. That's the most recent.

30:47 And the one now that's doing relationships or diagnosing your family tree and doing relationships. So we encourage you, check out the website. also know that we have on our website liferecovery.com we have information about upcoming conferences intensives and things like that so check it out we love you and have an awesome awesome week, I have an emergency. What is your location? Music.

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